GREAT Teacher Onizulang

I couldn’t help but watch in anguish how defunct a state my blog had become. It used to prosper during my NS days, when I had the luxury of time. Sadly speaking, time had deserted me a long time ago.

It had been a while since I had a free weekday all to myself! Fortunately today was free because this week is orientation for NIE students, and nothing was planned for today. A welcomed break indeed.

So what have I been doing for the past month? The ministry had involved me in a programme called the “Enhanced Schools Experience” (ESE) which bore the purpose of exposing student teachers to the actual working climate in schools. Its secondary and less glorious objective was to attrition the idealistics from the pragmatics.

(i.e. let those who think they couldn’t cope with such a job quit before their liquidated damages snowballed.)

Of course there wasn’t really such a choice for Ah Lang. He had been happily feeding himself on Government coffers ever since he was a university student. But he had no intention of quitting either, (and the reasons were elaborated earlier in another entry.)

So one month ago, I had found myself unceremoniously dumped in a school when less than two months ago, I was still booking in and out a military camp in Bedok. The rapid change in lifestyle really did catch me on my heels. From a low ranking soldier contented to taking orders and skive to a person responsible for other peoples’ grades and lives, the sudden surge in responsibilities forced a knee jerk adjustment in my lifestyle.

And compromising my blog was one of the inevitables.

Fortunately I was posted to a reputable school near my house. Gan Eng Seng School (GESS) was comparably better to any other neighbourhood school in Singapore in terms of discipline and student ability.

Being a non-fussy man, I was fine with any school given to me, but if they wanted to post me to a good neighbourhood school,

I shall accept the posting with grateful tears.

In case you had been tricked into thinking that GESS is a school full of angels, you better think twice. Every school in Singapore has its fair share of students with differing standards of discipline and academic ability. (I shall refrain from saying “good and bad” students because all my students are not rubbish.) There will be late comers, rowdy classes, disrespectful students, lawbreakers, and kids who loved to make impolite references to your parents.

No I am not being theatrical here. The above mentioned were all matter-of-facts in the school scene now. I had a couple of experience at handling tough kids who shot me a “who the hell are you?” response the moment I entered the classroom. It is a challenge to guide these kids, and I really respect the good teachers who could find a way with them. No doubt I am a newbie now, but I will find a way with them in future and join the ranks of the divine greats in the education service.

Lest anyone despaired over the future of our nation, there were good kids too. In a classic example of how Ah Lang rode his luck to absolute success, he was assigned to three sec 3 express classes. Classroom management was not much of a problem for them, as compared to the NA and NT students. The challenge of the job was to keep my students interested for learning. Fortunately again, this fell into the realm of Ah Lang’s fortes.

I am just so dammed good at disturbing young people J

Example 1:

Two students were talking at the back of the class. It just so happened that they were of different gender. Reprimand them in public for not paying attention in class? No way man. Just observe silently without them noticing you. Like how I spied on the wingers and strikers on the pitch as a sweeper. While they were busying focusing their attention on the stoppers and full backs, I had already covered their possible paths in mind. The moment they beat my defenders,

I will be there.

Boy and girl like to talk in class? No problem. Look at how the girl smiled so happily while listening to the sweet nothings of the boy. So blissed in happiness that it would be a sin to disrupt them. The only thing I could do was to play the role of a catalyst. When I needed students to present solutions on the board, I knew which pair of students I needed to call.

"Would Mr X and Miss Y come up and present the solution of this problem together?" (Note: The Sultan and his princess were not named to spare their blushes.)

Example 2:

A student was a bit listless in class. Apparently she had either understood whatever I was teaching or simply couldn’t be bothered. Let's give her the benefit of the doubt since she is a bright girl. However, I could not believe the boy playing basketball outside the classroom was more handsome than me, so why should she look out of the window? I realised I needed to get her attention back whatever the costs. Again, Ah Lang had to look for her “moment of vulnerability” to strike. I played with my time throughout the lesson, and finally I caught her tail.

“Pin Li, why do you like to stick out your tongue in class? Are you very hot?”

Knowing the names of all my students is a very powerful weapon against noise and sleep in class. (33+42+42=117 names only).

Just as the innocent young things thought it was safe to sleep in my class, suddenly

“(Student X), can you tell me what is the coordinate definition of cos A?”

A perfect trap. The answer was staring at him loudly on the board. If he could not answer my question, even a fool could figure out that he was not listening to what I was saying. On hardworking students, the shame and attention generated was enough to keep them awake for this lesson and beyond.

Knowing names could only mean more fun. The stunned face of a kid when I greeted her as she was walking past me was a once in a lifetime expression.

“Good morning, Angeline.”

She turned back in a daze.

“Mr Khoo how come you know my name???”

Knowing names was the bare minimum gesture for any teacher aspiring to be GREAT to show the kids that he or she cared. Once they know you cared, classroom problems became so much more manageable. (At least less people talk and sleep out of respect or fear.)

And then there was this girl in one of my classes who could not keep herself from bursting into a smile or laughter whenever I spoke to her or looked at her for more than a second. So cute!

Maybe I should match make her to my brother (who also happens to be in the same school and same level as her). Then there would be more peace and laughter from KSH whom forever wore a bastard face at home. It should be an easy job since she knows KSH. In fact, she was the one who asked me whether KSH is my brother.

I shall respect Miss Poon’s privacy by not naming her.

And I had unwittingly started a craze in school. In one of my attempts to keep my students awake, I was forced into showing one of my football tricks. Low class tricks that Tweety and Weixiang would dismiss them without any respect. But it was good enough to trick young people.

Just drop a pencil case onto the lace, and do a camel.

News spread fast. Very soon every class I walked in DEMANDED that I perform the same trick for them. I could catch some of my boys attempting it while I walked past their classes after school. I had even heard that there were boys trying it the secrecy of their scout den.

One trick had elevated Mr Khoo to celebrity status in school.

It was really fun in school especially for the two weeks I spent teaching them. But there had to be an end for everything. One month was indeed a very short time.

Many of them could not believe it that I was leaving so soon after I had just started. I couldn’t prevent the disappointed faces from surfacing. But definitely I don’t deserve the presents that they had given me. I haven’t really done much for them really.

I would still need to thank 3E, 3H, and 3I for their cooperation for not giving me serious classroom management troubles. I also appreciated the card from 3I, gifts from Poh Gek, Stephanie and Liting, Rena, Pin Li, Leonard, JJ, and many more.

One month ago I couldn’t wait to leave. Now I couldn’t bear to leave.

Life has to go on, and the doors of NIE are waiting. As I stepped towards it, I knew I am stepping closer to my destiny. That is, to become

GREAT Teacher Onizulang.

Comments from an Outsider

Today I was taken aback by the comments of the groundsman at my evening game. (i.e. the uncle in charge of opening the gates
and setting up the corner flags.)

"You guys did not lose your temper despite getting hacked at the legs
throughout the game. Played like how real men should. Really very good!"

Being a seasoned spectator of weekend games, his words really struck me deeply.

We were very flattered indeed, although personally for me I was used to all these hackings and hard challenges from opposing strikers and wingers. It was all part of the game. I just did not expect to be praised for the way I had beening playing (for so many years).

There was this #16 from the other team. Very rash. Kept making silly challenges. I could have blown my top, but for what? We were already leading. It would be silly to get a card or even sent off. Instead, I just told my defenders that

"Number 16 is not playing for the ball. Be careful of him. Watch out for your legs."

While in my mind I told myself that he would deserve a hard tackle from me if the opportunity presented itself. He took an extra touch while controlling a high ball from his defender. I saw that and went straight in with a shoulder barge (plus a hidden elbow). Although it was not enough to send him to the ground, it was enough to rob the ball from him considering
he was of a stronger physique than me.

Don't lose your temper, but yet don't lose your courage. When someone charges at you, you can either soften up and run away, lose your temper and slog it out, or keep your cool and strike them when they were vulnerable.

The fox in me chose the last of them. Never knew Ah Lang was such a vicious and cunning guy right? Try telling me to relax when #16 kept on whacking my friends' legs like they were rubber instead of bones.

They did put us under considerable pressure for their hard approach to the game. But we simply did not give up and lose our cool when it mattered most.

Sounds like handy advice to all those aspiring real men out there.

Well, the score line did not lie. We won the game 7-1.

A Smile After a Defeat

My team had lost an important match just now by 0-1. The goal we had conceded was rather ridiculous too. A harmless look chip which dropped into our far post. It left us dumbfounded right from the 5th minute of the game.

Instead of rallying ourselves for a comeback, we just got pushed harder by the opponents. They were coming at us with full force. Their defenders kept pumping the long balls towards each of our defenders. I was guilty of missing one of them. I misjudged one of the goal kicks and did not make a clean connection with my head despite being under little pressure. The winger gleefully latched onto my mistake and sped past me.

No one gets the ball and speed past Ah Lang.

When that happens, the priority would no longer be the ball, but the man. I sprinted back and wrestled him down to the ground with my arms. A yellow card was still better than conceding a goal.

Worst was to come. Our sweeper was injured towards the end of the first half. Fortunately, the ref blew for the interval. Our captain was fustrated with our approach again. We gave them too much respect. Yes they are a decent team, but we needed to play our own game as well. Containing them and being passive would never help.

"Ah Lang, 2nd half the centre is yours. I'm injured."

I am not new to the sweeper position. It was a position which I could play. You only need 2 things to play as a sweeper.

Confidence and determination.

Confidence as in going in for the ball once you had made up your mind. No hesitation. No doubts. If unfortunately a mistake is made, just shrug it off and fight on. That is were determination comes in. Most of time when I played well I had these 2 things in mind all the time. I knew I had to draw them out today.

On some other days when I am more cautious, I would still track and follow the player as a SWEEPER even if the opponent had beaten my defender. For fuck man, really. For fuck? Today I did the right thing.

Just slide the bugger lah!

Miss the ball never mind. Once he had beaten my defender it would be the cue to go in. The only chance to get the ball (or man) before he accelerates and pushes the ball past me. This is my commitment to all my defenders. I will cover all of you. Just go in for the tackles. Don't worry about your backs. Nobody will beat me.

Despite the game ended at 0-1, we had played an awesome 2nd half. Nothing went through my defence. The attackers even had a goal disallowed. We had lost the game, but we had not lost our pride. Football is just like life. Good things only happen when we are able to cast away the fear of making mistakes and surge forward inexorably.

Don't be afraid of making mistakes. They will still come no matter how cautious we are. Just bear them in mind and face the next one bravely. They will never get us down unless we let them.

I would never have slided if I was afraid of not getting the ball. Was standing still and inviting them to beat you better or sliding in with the chance of getting the ball? Even if the slide did not get the ball, I could always pick myself up and hunt down the opponent and nudge him off it.

The scars and scratches found on my legs do not lie. I couldn't even walk straight. The knock on my left knee literally left me limping for life. But for the first time in a long time,

I was able to smile even after a defeat.

Ri Sou no Sekai

I had been guilty for not posting new entries for a long time. I would love to return to my more prolific days while I was in the army, but circumstances simply did not allow. Weekends then were carefree and I could do whatever I wished, be it resting or having fun. Weekends after I had started work became backup days for unfinished work.

Unfortunately, time seemed to be slipping out of my hands ever since I got more entrenched in the schedule that the National Institute of Education (NIE) had in stored for me.

It would be enlightening to mention what had I been doing for the past few weeks. I was officially matriculated into NIE on Monday (190606). Tuesday (200606) was a free day because it was the registration date for trainees with surnames from L to Z. Had to return for a short briefing from 1030 to 1200 on Wednesday (210606). Then there was a crash course for us on Thursday (220606) and Friday (230606 )to prepare us for our month long school postings starting on the following week. This crash course was officially known as the Teacher Preparatory Programme (TPP).

TPP was very helpful for freshly ORD-ed SAF personnels like me. For blur people still accustomed to taking orders from others in the army, this hectic 2 day course aimed at developing basic skills to control a bunch of kids was a godsend! Imagine going into a class of 40 students without knowing what to do... Being pushed around by kids would definitely be worse than being pushed around by a Black Sadistic Man (BSM). Nonetheless I would have the full impact of my civilian status thrust upon me regardless of whether I had completely shaken off my military consciousness. When a company size (BRC context) of kids greet in unison to the Great One in their class like the following,

"Goooooood Morning MR Khoo."

It would be so difficult to get accustomed to the new way people address me since barely less than a month ago,

I was still called "Corporal Khoo".

I would no longer be the soldier who had a rank permanently prefixed to his name. More examples?

"I, CPL Khoo Shun Chih, NRIC Number 81@()*@#_)*@$&@~?!?@$)$*%#!!!)(C, declare that, I do not possess any live rounds, empty cartridges, or any other forms of pyrotechnics, IN MY POSSESSION SIR!"

I would no longer be the bangalah who would sweep the leaves at the ring of fire in the mornings.

And I would definitely no longer be the man who would hold a rifle and protect the sacred gates of our camp.

Speaking of the guard room, it reminded me of Ah Wan (the RP) on my ORD day. Although I do not know him well enough to be able to rattle off the brand of his underwear without thinking, we became more than just acquaintances from the few encounters we had while I was on duty.

When I first saw him at the guard room that day, he was smoking alone at the flight of staircase outside the office. I went over and sat beside him for one last good chat before we parted for good. When he finished his last puff, he put his arm firmly on my shoulder and shoved me to the gate. The disappointment in his eyes as he opened the gate for me for the last time was so excruciating to my memory.

"Good luck, and don't look back on your way out."

It seemed strange at first, since that was only said to inmates who had completed their sentences as a reminder to them not to return to the prison. More importantly, it was a well wish to look forward and begin a new life. The army did feel like a prison to many of us in some sense.

I do not even know Ah Wan's full mandarin name (and vice versa), and yet both of us clicked like long friends. This is the magic of the army. Irregardless of language, race, religion, and education level, 2 total strangers who do not have a big difference in rank could still hit it off like old pals all in the name of "living the same shit life". A solidarity shared only among SAF personnels. Chances are it would not even be half as easy to make friends like that out there in the civilian world.

That is why army friends are all the more valuable.

I was fortunate to have a long chat with Weiting while he was standing in as COS on the same day. He spoke of his tired attempts at SOC, and only he and Ming Shun was left running for it. I knew Ronald wasn't a skiver as to the perceptions of many people. Despite his penchant for tears, he always took things in his stride like the steadfast man he had always been. No cheating, always does his best to whatever his capacity allowed. Although he never admitted it, he always adopted the "take it like a man and don't run away approach" towards many unpleasant things in his life.

You go, man!

And I was pleasantly surprised when Siwei and Egg messaged me over MSN the other day. They were asking me how was life in NIE, and did I befriend any pretty student teachers along the way. Same old shit from them, but I could not help but NOT to disappoint.

YES I did get to know some pretty student teachers!

That was a heartwarming MSN session despite being short. Somehow I missed the friends back in Bedok camp.

I had even went back today to pick some tickets for the NDP rehearsal this evening (Thanks to OC who offered them over MSN early in the morning). Unfortunately I was not able to attend it because I recalled the need to buy a new pair of soccer boots for tomorrow's game only at the eleventh hour. (My previous pair was rather badly damaged.) Anyway I haven't finished marking 3E's chem worksheets so that further compelled me to stay at home.

While in the office today I was pleasantly surprised to see Alfred as the COS. He was my other bunk mate apart from Ronald. It had been a long time since I last spoke to him and the chat with him today really brought back smiles and tears.

Come to think of it, I missed his late night strumming of the guitar strings coupled with the emotional enactment of James Blunt's "You're Beautiful". Alfred is really a talented musician.

My Saturday had not been as fruitful as I had wanted it to be. Would love to be at the stadium but had work to do. Would love to meet up with more friends but I was careless and did not approach them earlier in the week.

I should not grumble at the consequences caused by my lack of actions.

Heh, at least I am finally back to my blog! I was so occupied last saturday with preparing lesson notes that I didn't even have time for anything else. I should be thankful that I still have some time left for my blog today :)

Have to sleep early. Got an important game tomorrow morning against a good team. I will not make the same stupid mistake that I did the other time.

As I make the abrupt but inevitable transition from a slow paced, stress free world of the army to a hectic one in the education sector, I couldn't help but to miss the comforts of the former. Humans are cheapskate. We miss things only when they are no longer around. Maybe I would miss my current life one day.

That should not be the way.

We should appreciate the world that we belong to in whichever part of our lives right then, and not after. Because at that stage of our lives, they are our Ri Sou no Sekai.

The Ideal World.